Adventures In Acting - Relationships!
- Tom Sawyer
- Aug 31
- 4 min read
This Month's Collection of Acting-Related Thoughts and Feelings
"To get the full value of joy you must have someone to divide it with."
Mark Twain - Writer of "The Adventures of Tom Sawyer"
Relationships in Acting (and Life)
Actors need connection! Right?
It’s the core of our work and is our support system as we navigate the industry.
A scene partner who listens is dreamy, a director who plays well is a treat, an audience that pays valuable attention makes time stand still.
But even outside the rehearsal room and stage/set: relationships aren’t just useful tools for performance, they’re the foundation of our mental health, our sense of groundedness, and our ability to show up as our best creative self.
The Power of Relationships
As actors, we study the human condition. We spend hours dissecting the dynamics between lovers, rivals, families, and strangers yet, sometimes we forget to nourish the real connections in our own lives.
Strong healthy relationships aren’t a luxury; they’re a necessity. They help us weather rejection, celebrate wins, and stay balanced in an unpredictable industry. When our personal world feels stable and supported, we bring a fuller, freer self into our work.
The Trio of Types of Connection:
Friends,
Friends are your chosen family, your sounding board, your fellow adventurers. For actors, friends often double as collaborators, readers and cheerleaders. A true friend holds space for your struggles, celebrates your breakthroughs, and tells you the truth even when it’s hard to hear.
Family,
Family dynamics can be complex. Some actors find unwavering support at home, while others may wrestle with misunderstanding or disapproval of their career choice ("get a REAL job!"). Whatever your situation, it’s worth acknowledging that family relationships, whether biological or chosen, can shape your sense of safety and identity. Recognising what a "Mother", "Father", "Sibling" (older and younger) is to you might help unpick those relationships in your work.
Romantic Relationships A romantic partner can be a refuge from our work, a partner-in-crime, or, at times, a safe place to share your fears and ambitions. In an actor’s life where schedules are unpredictable and emotions run high, romantic relationships require intentional care. Communicate your needs, set shared expectations, and be honest about how you are feeling, after all they are part of your team. A supportive partner can make this wild journey feel less lonely and infinitely more joyful.
Honesty Is Your Superpower
Whether in friendship, family, or romantic relationships, honesty is the golden thread that holds relationships together. This doesn’t necessarily always mean brutal truth-telling at every turn, but being open and honest with your representation and your support network however vulnerable it may feel.
Honesty builds trust, and trust is what allows you to fully relax into your personal and professional relationships. That solid foundation of trust, in turn, fuels your creativity.
Mental Health and Relationships
Acting is a wonderful craft but the acting industry can feel cold sometimes. Long periods of waiting, constant rejection, or the uncertain future can take a toll. Your relationships can serve as anchors during these uncertain times, they remind you that your worth is not tied to the last audition or the next job.
Equally, it’s vital to notice when a relationship is damaging to your mental health. Learning when to nurture a relationship and when to step back is also one of the most important skills an actor (and human) can cultivate, as boundaries are also an act of love.
On and Off Stage
The best actors understand relationships deeply, both on stage and off. By nurturing your connections in real life, you sharpen your instincts for storytelling. The laughter shared with friends, the complexities of family bonds, the intimacy of romance all of it feeds your craft.
So, invest in your relationships, check in with a friend, call your loved ones, write a letter to someone close and, if you’re in a romantic partnership, plan a date night that has nothing to do with acting. These connections aren’t distractions from your work—they are the work.
Final Thought
In the end, your career will be defined not only by the roles you play, but also by the relationships you nurture. Surround yourself with honesty, kindness, and people who see the real you. When you’re supported in your personal life, your acting performances will be deeper, truer and coming from the most human parts of you.
Stay Connected
Stay Playful
Adventures In Acting studio can now be hired! Now known as "The Playroom"
Whether you are looking to run a small play reading or need to record a self tape with enough space for a full body shot book yourself a slot at our East London home at Playhouse East, where there are many other spaces available for hire.
You can also hire some expert coaching from the the best acting coach in London (maybe the world) Tom Sawyer at an additional but very reasonable rate.
From £11.50 an hour you can come play in this wonderfully create space.
Looking forward to seeing you there.
Let's Play!
The ABC of Acting
Acting Book Club:
Arnold Schwarzenegger’s Be Useful isn’t just a self-help book, it’s a wake-up call for anyone chasing a dream. For actors, it’s a reminder that success doesn’t come from waiting to be discovered, but from showing up with vision, grit, and discipline every single day. Arnold’s life proves that reinvention is possible when you commit fully, whether that’s stepping into a new role, mastering a skill, or pushing through rejection.
What makes it powerful for actors is his mantra: be useful. On stage or screen, that means serving the story, your fellow performers, and the audience. It flips the focus from self-doubt to contribution and that shift can be career-changing.
Enjoy!
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Thanks for your attention—stay playful, people.
Tom
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